The world according to Rod Cuthbert

Has Tasmania gone missing??

Imagine my shock when, arriving back at my New York hotel recently after purchasing a new pair of Merrell World Passport slip-ons, with the patented world map on the sole, I discovered that Tasmania, the place of my birth, does not exist in the Merrell world!

Good gracious!

I had been in Tasmania only recently, but a quick check of the “manufactured on” stamp on the box showed that the shoes were newer than my latest visit. This left open the possibility that something had changed in the antipodes, and just maybe that “something” was quite awful.

This really did lay me low: I immediately cancelled plans to attend the Morrissey concert at Madison Square Garden that evening in order to fully think through the implications of this potentially disastrous news. (By a freaky coincidence, the performer also cancelled, leaving thousands of devoted fans disappointed. But not me: by then I had far more pressing matters on my mind.)

I left New York immediately for my US home-base, San Francisco. From there I initiated a series of international calls to my loved ones in Hobart and other parts of Australia’s island state (known to most Americans only because of the Tasmanian Devil, a nasty little critter best seen on TV rather than in person, if you want my opinion). The calls left me a little confused and not quite certain of the actual state of affairs: my dear Mother didn’t understand my query as to whether her home had been obliterated and she was now living in a parallel universe; my brother Geoff hung up on me; and the Hobart Police Station put me through to a terrorism call-in line, where I waited 20 minutes before hanging up myself.

Tasmania, as it should be

Clearly I need more concrete evidence. I quickly raced to K-Mart, where a large array of world globes were available at attractive prices.

I wasn’t so much interested in the price as the manufacture date; I wanted one that contained the latest, most up-to-date cartographic representation of the southern latitudes.

And yes, $49 later, I see that Tasmania is there, the globe was literally hot off the factory floor, my mind was at ease.

What were those people at Merrell thinking? Don’t they understand the flow-of effects of a mistake like this? If I were a litigious type I would consider some sort of legal action, I suppose. But I’ll be happy if they just put Tasmania back on their map…

–Rod Cuthbert

Planning a trip? Browse Viator’s tours in Hobart and things to do in Tasmania, then send Rod a postcard letting him know that his beloved homeland is still alive and kicking.

Cool tattoo, cool board

For the five or six months I spend each year in Sydney, I’m happily lodged in a small but unbelievably well located flat (Americans would say apartment) right across the road from Bondi Beach, Australia’s most famous strip of sand. Bondi is only a kilometer or so long, but it’s a magnet that attracts both an intensely loyal bunch of locals and a wide-eyed and never ending stream of tourists, eager to know what the fuss is all about. It’s impossible to take a walk along Bondi without seeing something that will instantly strike you as new or beautiful or weird or crazy or talented or… well, you get the picture. Here’s a snapshot of some things I noticed during my most recent visit…

Surf Culture

OK, surf culture is kind of obvious at Bondi, but the depth of it is unreal, with many sub-genres in existence. Here’s three you might not notice unless you look for them:

1. The recently minted tourist surfer
They’ve done three lessons with “Let’s Go Surfing” and bought their own board. Unfortunately the lessons were mostly in two-foot waves, and the new board has a sharp, pointy nose. So, imagine being out there on a five-foot wave with one, no — let’s say six! — of these guys, they’ve all been out drinking the night before, they’re slightly aggressive at the best of times anyway, and they weren’t paying attention during the lesson on “sharing the waves.” You get the picture, right?

Clubbies take to the water

2. The clubbie
Mostly seen in the early mornings — before 7:30am, say — or anytime at all on a Sunday morning, when the Surf Lifesaving Clubs literally take over the beach. Look out for well tanned blokes in little red speedos running down to the water with a surf ski under their arm, then disappearing for an hour as they paddle around to Bronte. On Sundays there’s all sorts of organised competitions or training, and on certain weekends clubs from other beaches visit Bondi for a full-on carnival. Expect beer consumption to peak later in the day. If you’re wondering why the clubbie is an important species, hang around at the beach long enough for a freak wave event and see what happens when two hundred tourists get washed out to sea. Very few people drown at Bondi; clubbies are the reason why.

3. Cool Japanese surfer-dude
A rare though not entirely uncommon breed, there’s usually one or two in the surf on any given day, but frankly they’re more interesting out of the water. Straight from Harajuku to Bondi, they have the coolest hair, the hippest clothes and the best looking friends. They sort of blend in when they pull on a wetsuit, so look for them on Hall Street instead. No-one is certain if they all surf, or just come down to look good and hang with their mates. Full marks for appearances, though.

The Shark Boat

No sharks, again

Sharks? Well, there hasn’t been a shark attack at Bondi since the 1930’s, when nets were first introduced. Few people notice the boat come in each week to check the nets, which seem randomly placed across the mouth of the bay. There’s a lot of debate about keeping the shark nets, focused on what other species get trapped alongside the occasional shark. Authorities are unlikely to remove them, though, for fear that an attack will leave them open to litigation. In the meantime, enjoy Bondi knowing that should you be taken by a shark, you’ll be the first victim in almost 80 years…

Sculpture by the Sea

Big blue beach, big blue sculpture

From modest beginnings in 1997, this annual outdoor art event is now the biggest drawcard on Sydney’s arts calendar. And why not? With over 100 sculptures placed along the Bondi to Tamarama Beach walk, there’s probably no better way to spend a weekend morning in Sydney than visiting this impromptu seaside gallery. In the early years some artists created pieces that were anchored or in some way interacted with the water. During the course of 18 days you’ll always get a big storm or two, and it’s tough seeing your work blown out to sea, so nowadays everything seems to be safely on land. If you’re in Sydney in November Sculpture by the Sea is un-missable. That may not be a word, but you’ll know what I mean.

Paparazzi

Everyday Bondi: Paparazzi lie in wait

The first thing I do when I get back to Bondi is make a cup of tea and a slice of toast with butter and vegemite, then sit in the sun-room and look out at the beach. I did just that couple of weeks ago, and spotted two very suspicious blokes skulking (yes, skulking) behind the bushes across the road. “Jeez, these blokes look like paparazzi,” I said to myself. Turns out they were, and they were stalking Rodney Adler, the high-profile businessman who’d been released from jail a few days earlier and was enjoying an espresso at Aquabar, a coffee shop downstairs from me. Bondi fact #1: Americans go to Disneyland to celebrate, but Sydney-siders go to Bondi.

Aquabumps

If you’re on the southern end of the beach around 6:30am on weekdays you’ll spot Eugene Tan, with his long lens and a serene gaze that seems to capture just about everything that’s interesting, colourful and cool. Two or three hours later, 25,000 people around the globe open Eugene’s newsletter, Aquabumps. It’s a daily dose of what the waves are doing, a couple of sublimely liquid surfer shots, the odd pretty girl in a bikini coming out of the surf, and anything else that catches his eye. That you could build a whole business around a newsletter with pretty much the same content options day after day after day says something about Bondi: it’s always changing, and always its same old beautiful self…

-Rod Cuthbert

Rod’s sure-fire, patented, 100% guaranteed cure for jet lag

First, an admission: Until recently I had never, ever taken one of our many hop-on hop-off bus tours.

That’s despite the fact Viator offers them in tons of great locations, like Rome, Paris, New York, London, Barcelona, Florence, Washington DC etc, etc. But I’ve always looked down my nose at them, thinking they were way too “touristy” for me, and that I could find lots of other ways to get to know a new city without rubbing shoulders with the hoi polloi or getting sunburned* on an open-topped bus.

(Editor’s note: strictly speaking, hoi polloi means “the masses” so “the hoi polloi” is a bit redundant. But I’m the Editor and Rod is the Chairman. Say no more.)

Anyway, a few days in New York recently cured me of that elitist view, and now I’m a fully-fledged convert. An evangelist, even. And just so you don’t cling to the same viewpoint, I want to share my new-found awareness, and I’ve put together these five pretty good, possibly even compelling reasons, to take one of these tours next time you have the chance.

1. The Cure for Jet Lag

When you travel you have to do a little, or maybe a lot, of adjusting to ensure you don’t sleep through the best part of the day. Sitting on the top deck of a sightseeing bus is about the best possible thing you can do to defeat jet lag, because it allows the sun to tell your brain it needs to adjust the hour hand on your body clock. I’m not sure how it does that, but believe me, it does. Lesson one: spend your first available time in a new city on a hop-on, hop-off bus, not under the fluorescent lights at the museum!

2. Discover Which Way is Up

Or, more specifically, where is the Lower East Side? The Left Bank? Trafalgar Square? The White House? The Magnificent Mile? Where can I get dry cleaning and breakfast close to the hotel without paying crazy prices? Reason two: these and a million other questions can best be answered from atop your sightseeing bus, not from the subway, a taxi or a limo!

3. Comfort Zone

How many visitors to New York City miss the opportunity to visit Harlem, Brooklyn or the Lower East Side because of some baseless concern about taking the subway, or the expense of taxis, or even some perceived danger in “straying off the beaten path?” Well, nothing could be safer than the comfortable confines of your top-deck perch, where you’ll quickly see that a city’s previously off-limits neighborhoods are inviting, not too far from your hotel, full of regular people, and just as safe as your own neighborhood back home. Reason three: you can get comfortable with a city quickly, once you’ve seen it in comfort!

4. Travel Fitness

A typical sightseeing day in a big city involves so much walking, standing, waiting in line, eating, exploring and generally wearing yourself out that you need all the help you can get to see it all. OK, here’s another way of saying this, less diplomatically: you probably aren’t quite fit enough to do half these things AND take a walk down to Greenwich Village. Or the White House. Or The Rocks. Or Pont Neuf. If you really want to see everything, you have very few choices: walking (you’ll only see 5%); subway (hello? it’s underground!); taxi (limited view, expensive); limo (ditto and more); skateboard / rollerblades (really?) or… hop-on, hop-off. QED.

5. Hello, and Nice to Meet You

Of course you have your own posse with you, whether it’s just your partner or the whole tribe of kids, grandparents and the other usual suspects. But there’s just nothing quite as much fun as meeting someone from another place — like, really another place, say Iceland, or The Isle of Skye — and discovering that you are both celebrating birthdays, or that they can help you get your new camera to work, or that they know the name and the address of the seafood restaurant you read about in the Times last month. Meeting new people is the best part of being a traveler, and the top deck of a bus is just a perfect place to meet them. I might even be there.

OK, are you convinced? I hope that, like me, you can put away your prejudices and jump on board next time you are in a big city. You won’t regret it. And… Viator loves hop-on tours so much we have a whole page devoted to them, so don’t complain you couldn’t book in advance…

–Rod Cuthbert

* Oh, yeah, about that asterisk: take a hat.

Editor’s note: Rod Cuthbert (a.k.a. Viator’s Founder and Chairman) is working on a screenplay. If you’re a Hollywood agent looking for a ’sure thing’, leave Rod a comment and his people will call your people.

“SOLD OUT”

A Love Story Not Meant to Be

By Rod Cuthbert

FADE IN: ACT 1, SCENE 1

INT. SUBURBAN AMERICAN HOME - DAY

MAN FLIPS THROUGH PARIS GUIDEBOOK, LOOKING TRIUMPHANT

So you are taking your new girlfriend to Paris for a few days. It’s romantic, it’s got lots of culture and you will glow in the reflected light of this perfect choice.

MAN CLUTCHING MOULIN ROUGE DVD AND PICTURE OF WOMAN

And, it’s a surprise, well, it was supposed to be a surprise, but you let it slip out because you are so excited about it, you are going to the Moulin Rouge cabaret, because your girlfriend loved that movie and, even if you suspect it’s really Ewan McGregor she loves, you are going to make it come alive for her.

You are a man with a plan. You are going to kick this relationship up a gear or two and — God forbid — if things go well you may even propose on the Eiffel Tower.

FADE IN: ACT 1, SCENE 2

INT. SUBURBAN AMERICAN HOME - NIGHT

MAN SITTING AT DESK WITH COMPUTER

Whoa, steady on there man. Let’s book those flights first. Check.

Hotel? Found a great place in St. Germain, check. Pickup from the airport? Check. Passports, guidebook, cash… check, check, check.

FADE IN: ACT 2, SCENE 1

EXT. PARIS STREET SCENE - DAY

MAN AND WOMAN WALKING HAND IN HAND, IN LOVE

And how well is this going? Uneventful flight, customs was a breeze, a man in a beret holding a sign with your name on it at Charles de Gaulle, the hotel room is divine and your stocks have risen more than you could have ever dreamed.

Early evening, dinner at La Coupole and a walk on the Seine, back to your hotel and maybe now is a good time check with your concierge about Moulin Rouge tickets…

FADE IN: ACT 2, SCENE 2

INT. FRONT DESK IN LOBBY OF PARIS HOTEL - NIGHT

MAN STANDING IMPATIENTLY AT CONCIERGE DESK.

CONCIERGE OBVIOUSLY HAS BETTER THINGS TO DO THAN TO HELP MAN

CONCIERGE

Saturday night? Of course… but for which month, monsieur?

Surely not this Saturday? Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Surely monsieur is joking with me? You Americans like to make your little jokes…

MAN STARTS PACING NERVOUSLY (CLOSE-UP)

MAN (VOICE-OVER)

Stay calm. This isn’t happening, OK?

Of course you book this stuff through the concierge, that’s what everyone does.

Geez, mom and dad booked through their concierge when they were here in, well, it was 1975…

WOMAN WALKS OVER TO MAN.

SHE’S BOUGHT A FENDI SCARF AT THE LOBBY SHOP.

WOMAN

Darling, the scarf’s a steal at €75 and I’ll need it for the Moulin Rouge later.

There’s always a little nip in the air in the evening.

WOMAN PAUSES AND OVERHEARS DISCUSSION BETWEEN MAN AND CONCIERGE

WOMAN IS AGITATED

MAN

No babe, there’s no problem. Really, it’s all good, we’ll get the tickets somewhere else…

…no, I didn’t book in advance, the concierge can handle that sort of stuff…

OK, yes, I take your point. He obviously can’t handle this particular request, but if we wanted to go next month he would be happy to help. Well, there’s no need to get upset, let me make some phone calls…

…no, I don’t think I should have let you handle it, I’m quite capable…

…calling me names really won’t help, and no, I don’t agree there’s any relationship between my ability to book a simple thing like a night out and whether I could function as the head of a household. Yes, I’m sure your last boyfriend would have done a great job of arranging things. Well, for that matter my last girlfriend wouldn’t have needed a $200 Gucci scarf to look good in Paris, either.

OK, Fendi, Gucci, I don’t care. Let go of that, it’s got my passport inside.

Oh my God, your nails are sharp… help, security!

FADE OUT:

VOICE-OVER FROM OFF SCREEN

Don’t let this happen to you. Booking key vacation activities ahead of time on Viator.com means you’ll never have to call Security to drag away your disappointed wife / girlfriend / lover. Leave nothing to chance. It is not worth the hassle.

FADE TO BLACK

–Rod Cuthbert

Rod Cuthbert is Viator’s Founder & Chairman. He recently attended the Moulin Rouge as a guest of the management, but would have booked online if he had needed to…

I got to thinking the other day: if George W. Bush (leader of the Free World) and John Howard (leader of the Free to go to the Beach World) were to go on vacation together, where would they go, and what sort of things would they do?

Bush was not a big traveler before he got the keys to Air Force One. He’d been to China with his dad, but was travelling officially and didn’t need a passport; nor did he need one for Mexico, so he didn’t have one. And Johnnie Howard seems cut from a similar cloth: for twenty-odd years he took his family on the same summer holiday, to Hawk’s Nest, a sleepy hideaway with a good beach and fishing, just a few hours drive from his home in Sydney. Neither of these blokes were big Lonely Planet fans.

But they’re both about to have some extra time on their hands, and now they’ve got so many new friends around the world they just might venture out a little more. Here’s my Top Five list for “Soon to Retire Conservative Leaders of Democratic Nations.”

1. The Puna Pau & Seven Moai Tour, Easter Island

Remind you of anyone?

There’s a couple of reasons why this is my number one choice. First, check out the photo. These dudes look familiar, and just a little frozen in time, wouldn’t you say? Similarities abound, and our ex-leaders will like that! Second, the locals on Easter Island are so far from everywhere they have a razor-sharp perspective on who and what’s really important, and my guess is George and Johnnie will get no better treatment there than the rest of the tour group. That’s pretty good treatment, of course, but it’ll bring them down to Earth fast. They need that, I reckon.

2. The London Eye, London
Well, naturally. And Tony could pop in as well, it would be like a school reunion. But the best part is the great views of Buckingham Palace, where Betty Windsor is having morning tea with her eleventh Prime Minister. Elected leaders come and go, but Monarchs reign forever, and live in nicer houses, too. Don’t even mention the Royal Train.

3. Bedouin Desert BBQ, Egypt
This one’s a bit cruel, isn’t it? The boys will be absolutely convinced that Osama B-L is behind every camel hump, ready to pop out and give them the raspberry, or the pomegranate or whatever fruit it is that desert-dwellers rely on for “giving it.” Anyway, I reckon they’ll love this tour, they’ll enjoy the food for sure, and spending a little time with some real, live A-rabs — besides the Saudi Royal Family — won’t do them any harm at all.

4. Mekong River Cruise, Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam
Re-writing history is a dangerous business, and we certainly don’t want George W. to get any of his facts wrong as he draws parallels between US forays into Iraq and Vietnam. We’ll resist political commentary and simply say that a few days on the ground in this thriving “Asian Tiger” economy might just convince him that an American victory isn’t the only way to a lasting peace. Educational tours are such fun!

5. Portage Glacier Tour, Anchorage, Alaska

Once it melts it will be easier to get to the oil…

Too easy, really: see the glaciers before they all melt. Both our soon-to-be-ex leaders are recent believers in the horrors of global warming, so they’ll understand why it’s important to get this tour in soon!

While we’re at it, we might calculate the carbon emissions associated with their trip, and whack the cost of an offset onto their bill. They’ll understand that everyone needs to do their bit about global warming, I’m certain!

All these tours and more are available to mere mortals, not just former Heads of State. With any luck, you won’t even bump into either of them when you’re out there. You’ll meet some nice people though, and quickly learn that travel is good for the soul.

It’s just a damn pity George and Johnnie didn’t know that 30-odd years ago. The world might be a better place if they had…

–Rod Cuthbert

Rod Cuthbert is the Founder & Chairman of Viator, Inc. He has travelled widely for many years, but has not invaded any sovereign states, or assisted others in doing so.

On the other side of the camera, on the Brooklyn Bridge

I spent last week in New York on a media tour, talking about Viator and some survey findings we’ve just released. Inevitably I got questions about our products, and in each interview I mentioned that I was planning to try the Private New York Tour with a Personal Photographer. Now, I’m always talking about the tours and activities we offer, but I’ve never had such a strong reaction as I had to this one. Everyone agreed that this tour solves a problem: you visit a great destination, take lots of shots, but there’s always someone missing from the photos… the photographer!

Marc Samuels understands this problem, and his tour is the perfect solution. Marc is a licensed New York City tour guide, a native New Yorker, and a pretty good photographer too. I took the tour on a muggy Thursday afternoon; we started late, around 5:30, and that meant sharing the subway with rush hour commuters, but Marc’s commentary and his incredible knowledge of the city kept it all moving along at a good clip. Times Square, Central Park, the Brooklyn Bridge and Greenwich Village all featured before I wilted under the pressure and we retired to one of Marc’s favourite restaurants for pasta and wine, and a discussion about his tour, what people want to see when they come to “the city,” and how he builds each trip itinerary on the fly rather than sticking to a set menu of locations.

Master of his domain: Marc in Times Square

It’s hard not to be infected with Marc’s love of New York. He knows the place inside out, from where to stand on the platform for a downtown-bound N Train to when you’re likely to see the Naked Cowboy in Times Square, he’s got it all covered. As you walk and ride the subway to the various locations you’ve agreed on, he keeps snapping away — he generally takes over 100 shots during a 2 hour tour — and later that day or the next morning a CD magically appears at your hotel front desk. No hassles with copyright or any of that stuff, they’re all yours.

Marc also posts your photos on a web site where you and your friends can access them online. This is a cool idea; it means you can give your fan club back home a single web link and they can look at all the shots without you having to send attachments and all that stuff that’s doubly difficult when you’re on the road.

All in all? Great value, and more take home memories than you’ll know what to do with. But don’t listen to me: by chance, one of our customers just sent in a review and somehow it came to me, and not the review page. But I’ll publish it anyway, because it’s a pretty good summary:

Marc Samuels met us in the lobby of our hotel and took us on a wonderful 4 hours walking tour of his city. He told us the history and pointed out points of interest where we could come back to during our stay. Educated us in how to use the subway which we did successfully for the 8 days, with a Metro card which he helped us purchase making travel very cheap. He also helped us find our way to Yankee Stadium and the other places we had intended to visit during our stay. This was all a bonus when you realise he was taking some of the best photos of us in New York. There were over 150 photos taken during the tour. I would recommend this tour to people who want a special memory of New York. Marc’s photography is excellent but his personal service and pride in his city is unbeatable. I would love to go back to share New York with my husband and we will certainly be booking this tour again. –Gail D, Australia

That kind of says it all…

-Rod Cuthbert

Book for travel in June and save 20% on the Private New York Tour with a Personal Photographer. For more ideas in NYC, check out Viator’s list of things to do in New York City, from Broadway shows to Manhattan helicopter tours… and everything in between.

Next time, book ahead

Surprisingly, Las Vegas isn’t the only place where you can find people willing to play high stakes poker. Viator recently asked 2,500 travelers if they’d ever been disappointed on a trip by finding something they wanted to do was sold out or unavailable when they needed it.

One-third of them said “yes,” which meant they had to change their plans on the fly – something that isn’t always easy to do in an unfamiliar city where the locals may, or may not, speak the same language as you.

The lesson here? Don’t gamble with your trip.

Planning your trip activities before you leave home can save time, money and… headaches.

Now that Memorial Day has come and gone in the USA, summer travel season is in full swing. Whether staying near home or traveling abroad, travelers should expect crowded and oversold planes, limited hotel capacity and more people on the roads. This also means more people will be booking activities, events and tours in advance so we suggest you plan ahead and book the things you want to do early – preferably before you leave.

Since it’s what we do, it’s no surprise Viator has been monitoring traveler behavior around booking trip activities for years. In my recent travels, I’ve been having discussions with local tour operators on different continents who’ve shared how the internet has increased advance bookings and squeezed some availability for walk-up sales.

We decided to look a bit closer than our customer surveys and conversations with operators by commissioning two surveys – one for each of these segments. In short, we found what we’ve anecdotally known: more travelers are booking activities in advance than recent years and this has, in turn, limited capacity of many attractions. What we didn’t expect was just how many travelers have been shut out of doing what they wanted while on vacation. Some survey highlights (click here for full press release):

Tour operators are seeing more advance bookings, limiting on-site availability

• About 50% of tour operators said advance bookings have increased during the last year
• 3 in 4 tour operators (77%) said advance bookings has limited walk-up availability

More travelers are booking in advance as 2 in 5 say they’ve found “sell outs” while on vacation

• One-third (33%) of travelers say they are “more likely” to book trip activities in advance than they were three years ago
• More than one-third of vacation travelers (39%) say they have tried to purchase tickets for a local activity but were forced to change their plans or skip the activity because it was sold out on the day/time they wanted to go
• Those once burned have learned a lesson: Of those travelers who previously missed out, 42% are now more likely to book their trip activities in advance of travel, more so than those who haven’t experienced the same disappointment (25%).

Saving time (54%) and money (54%) tied for the most important reasons for booking in advance. Other reasons cited by travelers for planning ahead were:

• To budget accordingly (52%)
• To not miss out on interesting activities they may otherwise not find out about at the destination (48%)
• To know their itinerary before they go (46%)
• To avoid waiting in line (45%)

At Viator, we’re all travelers and understand the significant investments made in vacations. Why gamble on missing the activities you want to experience at a destination? It’s simply not worth it.

Setting aside some time to research and plan before you leave home can help save valuable vacation time since you won’t have to do the research while on vacation or wait in line to buy tickets. What sells out fast, has limited availability or long lines if you wait until you arrive to book? Lots of things, including iconic, “must-see” activities like:

• Helicopter tours in general, but especially helicopter tours in New York and Las Vegas helicopter tours
  
• Anything to do with the Moulin Rouge in Paris
• The British Airways London Eye
• Viewing Da Vinci’s ‘Last Supper’ in Milan
• Vatican and Sistine Chapel Tours in Rome

Researching before you depart can also help you uncover interesting things to do on your trip you might not otherwise know about. And, don’t forget the strain on your wallet as experts predict more crowds and higher prices this season. In advance, you can easily comparison shop online and get the benefit of Viator’s low-price guarantee.

Have you ever experienced “vacation disappointus?” Sold-out events or activities? Long, seemingly endless lines? Share the tale with your fellow travelers.

–Rod Cuthbert

I’ve always been a great advocate of the hop-on hop-off bus tours that we offer in so many of our destinations. They provide a wonderful way to get acquainted with the city — its various districts, the key attractions and even the places to avoid — while at the same time getting you out in the sunlight and helping your body clock adjust to the new time zone. In Paris, we now offer a tour with all those benefits, but just a little more personalized and special: The private ‘Secret Paris Tour’ by Citroen 2CV.

Pierre, sans beret, in the Citroen 2CV

Before I describe this wonderful tour, a word about the 2CV, or as it is more commonly known the deux chevaux. Driving around Paris in a “dedeuche” — as passers-by will call out when they see you — is an experience in itself. The French have a great love of this car, and you will notice the reverence with which it is treated by pedestrians, traffic policemen and certainly other drivers, who seem happy to always give way to this iconic French auto!

This gives your driver a little more license to act with bravado, as you issue instructions to stop immediately for a photo opportunity, or to give you a moment to pop into the Robert Clergerie store to check if they have your size in those impossibly gorgeous boots you spotted in the window a moment ago.

That example really sums up the difference between this very, very personal experience and the albeit lower-priced but nonetheless group experience of the Paris hop-on hop-off bus. Your driver, inevitably Pierre and naturally wearing a beret, picks you up at your hotel door. By the time you arrive at the car he is in conversation with your concierge, who is relating his own dedeuche-owning experience back in the ’70s, and marveling at how well this particular model has stood the test of time. Pierre will now quiz you about your special desires as he prepares to tailor a tour just for you. The best hot-chocolate in Paris? Vinyl stores that specialize in ’60s jazz? Hidden architectural treasures? Little-known museums and galleries? Or just a leisurely drive to get you acquainted with this city that he loves…

One of Pierre’s girlfriend’s favourite sculptures…

And his knowledge of Paris, it turns out, is immense. All the company’s drivers are young and quite suitably enthusiastic about their city. Their English is perfect and many speak Spanish and German, too. My Pierre described each of his personal Paris highlights in terms of his girlfriend: “This is where my girlfriend and I buy the best ice cream in Paris,” and “This is where my girlfriend and I like to eat our ice cream.”

Pierre’s girlfriend is indeed a lucky young woman, as each of these recommendations turned out to match their billing. And Pierre’s advice helped on the negative side too: “Oh, yes, this restaurant certainly has a good reputation, but they didn’t lower their prices as Michelin took away two of their stars!”

So whether you’re coming to Paris for the first time, or have been before but wish to get a little further under the surface than your guidebook will take you, I can’t recommend this tour enough. You’ll love the open-top 2CV, marvel at the stick-shift and how anyone could possibly determine the difference between first and fourth gear, and delight at your guide’s intense knowledge and very personal connection to Paris. Right now the company is running a summer promotion that includes a bottle of TerraVentoux wine with every tour. A maximum of three passengers per vehicle, but the fleet is quite large so don’t hesitate to book a whole convoy if you have a group!

–Rod Cuthbert

Planning a trip to Paris? Browse Viator’s Paris tours, Paris shows & concerts and, d’accord, our tours by 2CV Citroen.

Travellers should never take notice of suggestions about what the supposed “highlights” of their destination might be. Highlights ought to be personal, not lifted from a guidebook or acquired from knowledgeable friends who’ve been there before you!

To illustrate what I mean, here are three things that I’m still thinking about after a recent trip through Asia and Europe.

In Bangkok…

Karma seems to be holding out, so far

In Bangkok I noticed that whole families travel on the one scooter, with apparent disregard for their safety. That’s taken care of by a scooter-blessing they can obtain from their local Buddhist Monks, who offset their otherwise frugal existence by dispensing such rites. Buddhist monks are thick on the ground in Thailand, but so are traffic accidents, which suggests that some riders are unblessed, or — God forbid — the blessings wear thin after so many miles. Whichever one it is, the fact remains that Mum, Dad and the kid/s all riding the same little scooter is a shock the first time you see it, especially if you come from a place where people buckle up in the back seat.

In fact, the concept of danger seems to be lacking in Thailand generally. If you tell someone you’re cold or hungry, there’s an immediate reaction; people rush around preparing food and gathering blankets, as it’s an immediate need. But then they’ll happily perch their kids on the front of their bikes sans helmet and weave through traffic, or let them stand up in the back of the family pickup at 100km/hr. That’s because there’s no immediate discomfort, and you can put your fortune down to luck (i.e., it’s bad luck if someone dies, not the fault of the driver letting his kids stand in the car, nor the fault of the other driver who was overtaking a bus around a blind corner).

In Thailand, I discovered, road safety is a function of all the karma you’ve accumulated, minus the good karma of the car / bike blessing, added to the bad karma of the opposing driver. Seat belts really have nothing to do with it.

In Berlin…

On a bike tour I took in Berlin, three guys from Jordan all chose girls bikes. Now, there were plenty of boys bikes to spare, and they checked them out but then decided — en masse, I’ll add — that the girl’s bikes were for them. And this was after the tour guide explained that “these bikes over here are the boy’s bikes, and these are the girl’s bikes.” So what was going on? Were they trying to provoke some sort of incident (”In Berlin, Islamist visitors reject West’s sexual stereotyping“) or was it an overprotective reaction to the bike’s design, which might lead a prospective male rider to believe that they had a greater chance of producing offspring should they suffer an accident while riding the girls design, as opposed to the boys, with its higher cross-bar and a possibly greater chance of unfortunate bruising? Frankly, I couldn’t work it out and I didn’t have the courage to ask, but it’s kept me guessing ever since.

In Ireland & Northern Ireland…

Irish cab drivers work eight hours a day and holiday in the Mediterranean. Well, at least all the drivers I met did. And that includes Northern Ireland, which I thought was beset by troubles so deep they actually call them “The Troubles,” but it turns out that’s all quite over, and they have almost full employment and a real estate market so hot even the working classes are spending their summers in Turkey. This may have something to do with Irish low-cost carrier Ryan Air, who’ll fly you practically anywhere in Europe for the less than the cost of getting to the airport in one of those aforementioned cabs, or it might be because things are just pretty damn good in Ireland and Northern Ireland right now.

Fishermen in Irish towns like Howth are enjoying their new status as wealthy homeowners

Another thing I learned in Ireland: one way of telling how well an economy is tracking is to calculate what % of the workers you encounter in service roles are natives. OK, maybe I read that in the Financial Times, but anyway I can report that Ireland is full of new arrivals from Poland, who are apparently immune to the weather — it’s no better at home — and have discovered Guinness in their off-hours. I wonder where they will choose for their vacations?

So… what?

See, none of these things are in the guidebook. And probably shouldn’t be either. But they prove the point that you’ll be interested in the stuff that catches your eye, not things that are interesting to the guys from Lonely Planet and Fodor’s. Use the book for the maps, they’re always helpful, but those pages on “What to see” you should tear out. They just add weight to your backpack…

–Rod Cuthbert

With special thanks to Jordan Digby for his insights into Thai road safety and the effects of good karma.

There’s not much of the wall remaining: it’s better that way

Ich bin ein Fahrradtourgeliebter.

I’m a big fan of bike tours — especially if you’re a long haul traveller, because it blows all the jet-lag away — and Berlin has all of the things you need for a really, really cool bike tour:

1. It’s flat

2. There’s tons of recent and extremely interesting history

3. There’s lots of watch-able people

4. And plenty of cool buildings

5. And finally, an easy to find meeting point, which is important if you get lost

Now Berlin is sort of special anyway: the whole Checkpoint Charlie thing, the Wall, the knowledge that half the population lived 28 years behind it, under the evil eye of the Stasi, yet only a few yards away from all the freedoms we take for granted. It was an unreal situation yet it’s only a few years ago since the Wall fell.

Like other bike tours I’ve done (Barcelona, check it out), the tour guide turns out to be key. I guess it’s kind of hard to connect with 15 or 20 people from a dozen different countries — our tour had people from Australia, the US, UK, Sweden, Germany, Italy, Jordan and Ireland — but somehow these guys manage to pull it off, getting everyone involved and happy, asking questions and learning all the way. Interesting note: the Germans, touring in their own country, had more questions than anyone else. Naturally inquisitive people, I guess.

Lost? Meet back at the TV tower, it’s easy to find!

Anyway: great bikes, flat terrain, stops every few minutes… it’s an easy and entertaining tour. The Wall turns out to be almost completely gone, but with a few sections now preserved and protected — a wall behind a fence! — and you certainly get a very real idea of what it must have been like. Checkpoint Charlie is a major tourist hangout but isn’t tacky, it’s got all the history laid out on big posters that make great reading. You soon realise you’re in the middle of a modern history lesson, and you’re enjoying it.

Lunch is cool too: a beer and sausage joint right by the new Holocaust Memorial. That sounds strange, I know, but Berlin is that sort of city. One minute you’re thinking about the Third Reich, the next you’re deciding between Bratwurst and Weisswurst.

After lunch there’s a long and pleasant ride through city parks, back along the river, the Brandenburg Gate, the Chancellor’s new pad and tons of great architecture, old and new. Here’s my summary: if you are smart enough and lucky enough to find yourself in Berlin, it’s a great way to see and learn more about the city than you’ll imagine possible. You go further than you would on foot, and you get closer than you would on a bus. You can’t beat the bike!

But finally, a warning! Don’t get sucked into playing that shell game that those slick Russian (or some other former Soviet Republic) dudes are running just near the bike tour meeting point. They have a bunch of “onlookers” playing and winning to suck you in, it looks easy, but when you play you never, ever win. I know. Sometimes even relatively sane people do completely dumb stuff.

-Rod Cuthbert

Browse all of Viator’s Berlin bike and walking tours and tips for what to see and do in Germany.